Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Morning Painting #26

Morning Painting #26
How Many?

What do you know for sure?

Doesn't that question sound daunting?  We often look to our elders and those we respect for guidance and direction.  In her monthly magazine, Oprah writes a column about what she knows for sure.  She and J.K. Rowling discussed that question in a recent interview.  Their responses were similar to mine, and I imagine to most of us. 

If that question were posed to me, my immediate response would be fear and an extreme heaviness in my heart.  Thoughts like "I don't know anything for sure" or "I'm still learning" or "How can anyone be sure about anything" would cross my mind.  Even the wisest among us may struggle with that question, right?  I wish I could hear your responses.  I imagine I would hear strong opinions using words like "faith," "belief," "spirituality," "the universe," etc. 

Is there anything that you know for sure?  How would you answer that question?  The answer to that is subjective, right?

Through my daily practice of Morning Paintings, I learned that I know one thing for sure:

Daily practice in a certain thing guarantees increased skill in that certain thing.
Increase is a key word.  Through my Morning Paintings, especially my journaling, I've been able to define a "safe place" as a physical place I go to or a spiritual place I access when I need to feel total acceptance, a place of freedom and nonjudgment.  Through my Morning Paintings, I've learned that some answers to certain questions are more meaningful if they are explored and discovered, such as:  How many layers of paint can you apply to your piece before it gets muddy and turns to junk?  Although this answer is a subjective one, I think we could agree that a painting generally could be interesting and unique . . .  or . . . mud and junk.

In order to discover the answer to that question, I knew I had to go beyond my usual limits and allow myself to work in unknown territory outside of my "safe place." 

Oftentimes I paint, adding layer after layer and at a certain point, I "feel" that the painting is finished.  But recently I dared myself to go beyond and to explore the mud/junk question.  It was SCAREEEEE.  With each added layer, regretful thoughts like "I should have stopped after that last layer" or "What was I thinking?"

Then my thoughts quickly turned to:  "Now what can I do to fix this"?  Or maybe the better question is:  "Can I fix this?"

Today's Morning Painting is the result of these thoughts.  What do you think?

Did I fix it?
The answer is a subjective one, right?

Objectively speaking, I'm making mistakes, mud and occasionally . . . magic.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Amazing, could feel the depth.